My Problem With Rock Star Novels

I am a huge fan of rock star books (especially romances), but have found myself frustrated lately as I try and find good rocker books to devour. The blurbs always sound fantastic, and the content is almost always meh.

And here's why:

• Silly bitches that get on my nerves
• If you're going to hang out with a rock star, especially if you know who the guy is, then you know that there are certain things that go along with the rock star life. Parties, groupies, press... lots of press. So many times the girl whines and complains about paparazzi or groupies or the rowdy parties. He's a ROCK STAR. Did you think the band would be backstage building Lego castles and eating Oreos? If the rock star life bothers you, perhaps you should date a dentist.
• Even sillier bitches who hate rough language
• If you're on a rock band's tour bus and you bitch at them for cussing, you need to get off the fucking bus!
• Too much "old flame" bullshit
• The concept of the girl running into her high school boyfriend who is now a famous rock star? Yeah, that's been done. A lot. Maybe give that storyline a rest for a while.
• Virgins and rock stars
• STOP THIS! While I'm not opposed to a virgin-meets-bad-boy story now and then, the reality of these rock stars jumping on the abstinence train to wait for the virgin to be ready is just not very plausible. Not saying it's impossible, but really...
• Rock stars that don't act like rock stars
• This one is just flat annoying. You're a rock star, not a middle schooler dammit! Grab a bottle of jack, the nearest groupie, and do something rocker-like already!
• Rock stars who do act like rock stars then become pansies because of love
• Look, I know love is supposed to tame the wild beast, but not too much. So many books start out with these great bad boy characters, and then they become complete wimps when they meet their HEA. WRONG! So, so wrong.

Give me a rock star romance with a bad boy who stays bad, a chick who can handle the rock lifestyle... maybe even a chick who can out-bad the bad boy... and for the love of Pete, if you're going to write a book about rockers, include the sex, drugs and rock-n-roll!!!

You know what the problem is? I discovered the rock star romance genre via Olivia Cunning, as many of us did... she's ruined us for the rest of them. Let's hope she keeps writing, because otherwise, we're all screwed!